I am currently experiencing another burnout.
We are at this season where we are seeing up to 200+ patients a day. Despite trying to space out appointments – it is always full at this time of the year. The burden is shared between at least 6 medical docs in a day but sometimes we have to make do with 4. And that could be exhausting with all the talking and thinking. There is just no time to take a sip of that water or go to the loo.
Then there is family to think about. My unfolded laundry is so piled up I could actually make 2 forts out of it. I have not been cooking as much too. I rarely watch TV. But I always make time for my HoboMinci, doTERRA and blog. Well, I try. Because these are outlets I need to go to after a stressful day.
Sometimes I get cross when I feel that my husband is not pulling his weight in the household – only to realize that he too is doing what he can for the family on top of completing his phD. The fact that he preps breakfast for the kids and shower them in the morning is a blessing already. I should be grateful. Alhamdulilah. Coz the only thing I do in the morning is take care of myself anyway. And he never demands for homecooked dinner.
It is at times like this that I feel I want to quit. Or I hate my job sorta thing. But I know I have to keep going and move on. So – take that pit stop, repair what you need and get on your way. Coincidentally, I came across a short clip by Aida Azlin recently which struck a chord in my heart. She talks about tasbih fatimiyyah and I guess that is how we wage war against tiredness etc. We nurture the power of the mind with zikr & doa.
with 100% conviction from our heart
Zikir to me are not just words. But it’s a form of worship where we could take as a conversation and speak to Allah about our problems and ask that He helps solve it. InsyaAllah.
With Zikr and doa, I pray that Allah bestowed upon me this path of turmoil and challenges because He thinks I am worthy of it. And that something good will come out of it. Mana tau dalam penat, takde selera makan kita jadi kurus. Ha ha ha ha.
I don’t understand Korean but my guess is audiences are supposed to vote as to who the real singer is. I came across this video because I was searching for HwanHee “Missing You” on youtube since the song was replaying itself in my head since dinner. I had thought it was sang by 2PM. I was wrong. Hwanhee and his duo buddy Brian, I think , were the original singers.
HwanHee is Singer No 3.
All 4 singers have almost the same tone and voice. But once the true star is revealed – I think we kinda get the picture why HwanHee became popular and not the other 3. When in fact, all of them have very good vocals. So what sets HwanHee apart from the rest of them?
What sets a specialist apart from a chronic Medical Officer with the same years of service? What sets a boss apart from his/her underlings? What sets you apart from copycat versions of yourself?
Good things need to come in a good package for it to stand out. It can be a little package but it has to be special. Hwanhee started off as a duo. He then took a leap of faith and did what most KPop stars opt to do – plastic surgery. A new hunky look combined with that million dollar voice – he was on the road to success. Hence, it takes more than just talent. Success begs for sacrifice, hard work, persistence, grit and that sprinkle of luck from the universe. The other 3 contestants too had a beautiful voice but perhaps it was the road they chose in the first place which affected the time for their debut which made all the difference. Perhaps it is just not their time yet. Who knows if we will see Singer No 1 shine in 4 years to come?
Similarly, it takes more than just good brains to study to become a specialist. One needs to have that XFactor. Perhaps the right time as well. Therefore, to each their own.
This video also taught me that everyone has a competitor. And is replaceable. If for instance Hwanhee decides to be lazy and not work hard, it would not be impossible for Singer No 1 to fill in his shoes and take on the center stage. Singer No 1 could always work on the persona later but the voice is replaceable. So do not be comfortable. Too complacent with your existence if now you are at the top. Keep working hard. Keep inspiring. Keep improving. Keep being you.
Or one day you will be a relic. An antic. Old fashioned or part of ‘orang lama’.
HI PAMmers and Readers,
I find that I suck at planning because I tend to procrastinate – and I cheat on my To do List by doing the chores first, only to list it down and tick it later.*gulp* Mostly to make me feel organized and accomplished. Muekekeke.. So I guess I’ll stick to journalling and writing diaries or blogging – macam dulu2..
Today is my birthday. This year I purposely asked for a day off because on previous years when I’m at work – I was showered with wishes and cakes by colleagues. It was fun and weird. Not to mention the awkward group photos afterwards. Ha ha. Gosh.. I’m suddenly missing the attention. NOT! I guess I’ll give them a break this year – kot2 ada yg stress nak kena jadi wakil beli kek bagai.. 😛
I will be escorting Mr Husband to a weekend course later. So allow me to share with you my so called creative work in my planner and journal. Have fun.
I hope you enjoyed your 1 minute plus eye candy. It’s not perfect but I’m looking into ways to improve its quality. Please share your layouts in the comments or better in the FB group – I really look forward to seeing them. I’m sure the admins would approve of them too. As of tomorrow, its the weekend aite – I’ll put up my haul post. Watch this space.
This relationship with Mr Husband is probably the longest romantic one I’ve had as compared to the other candidates. That’s why we call it marriage. It also means we can fart in each other’s faces like no ones business. This also means I get away with certain things and ideas just because I’m the wife.
I am not going to dispense any advice because usia perkahwinan baru 5thn jagung – I shall leave that to other marriage gurus. I also do not wish to praise my husband because well.. I am sure every other wife too thinks that their husband is the best, the most understanding, a great cook and such.
I learnt one great tip about keeping the marriage going though. And that is to always BEREBUT-REBUT. Berebut to bathe Ee, berebut to bring the rubbish out (lol..seronoklah sangat..), berebut to prepare breakfast, berebut to do the laundry (this I would pretend), berebut to be the best in what we do and try to outperform each other when it comes to work and of course berebut to nourish the other half with love and respect. So far the extreme enthusiasm to berebut is not 100% but hey, the idea is there. Tee heee heee..
Enough with berebut, I too want to narrate my hopes for the coming year of our marriage.
- Let’s do another House Mega Project. After all our home is our Jannah. It keeps our friendship alive, we are spending our hard earned money for a good cause and of course it brings out the best in you – your so called interior designing skills.
- When you have your semester break, maybe we can travel the world again. I don’t need London. Lombok pun boleh.
- Continue to be Redha with my current job description as an ED and Anaes Medical Officer. I understand at times I am sloppy when it comes to housekeeping and home cooked meals (not that you request for a full course meal anyway), or I am late with the laundry and spend my weekends in the hospital because I am oncall. InsyaAllah I will find a way out of this plateau life – in fact if there is a recognized external exam for Anaesthesia I will study and sit for it.
- Let me indulge in my hobbies – it seems that this time around it is revolving around planners, journals, scrapbooking and such. It will distract me from buying new tudung. Hihi.
- Ever consider trying for ‘adik Ee’?
Finally, be my best friend forever. Like ever and ever. Lets grow old together – probably making mistakes too along the way but still be able to laugh about them. cheers to being a team for the past 5 years – sometimes I can’t help being proud of myself for being able to spend my dreams and life with you.
And putting up with your sarcasm.
What if you saw yourself embodied as another person? What if you saw an alternate version of yourself in the form of another being? It feels strange yet familiar to see myself, a woman .. mirrored in a man.
Sometimes it felt like talking to myself. Although in reality, it may not be the case.
Fans of love stories call it a soulmate. If I’m a character in Terminator Genisys, this could be a predestination paradox.