No alibi pics

If ever I was accused of a crime or being Missing In Action (M.I.A) – I can’t really prove that I was at a particular place or time you know. As an alibi. Like these fabulous, happy moments. Where I’m supposed to be there but not really obvious. HIhihi.

*Photos copied from friends facebook pages*

shida bday

A surprise birthday wish to a colleague. Kinda lured her into the resuscitation area, asking if she treated the fake patient earlier of the day and enquired what the hell went wrong!. It worked and we celebrated with a cake from Secret Recipe.

I was there. I did not take the photo. But I was there.

iftar spital

Then there’s this moment where we had Iftar together at work. It was a quiet day and we managed to sit together at the table. Well I joined in a bit late because a patient who had a so called headache from 5PM decided to come to ED at 7PM near Iftar time to be seen. I thought he needed serious attention but it turned out he only wanted a Medical Certificate. WHATTTTTTT??? He came to Casualty just for a minor headache with no signs of increased intracranial pressure and normal vital signs!!!

Again, I was there. I did not take the photo. But I was there.


And this took place last night. A mini get-together at a nearby hotel to break our fast. I had to leave early because I have mata ayam Ee goes to bed latest by 9PM and the last thing I want to do is carry him to the parking lot. The food at Bayview Hotel was not too bad. Loved the meat and the potato salad. I wished there were more room in my stomach for more bowls of cendol. But I was full and on the brink of having a gastro-regurgitation. We paid RM59/pax for adults and RM39/pax for kids over the age of 4.

A last shoutout : I was there. I did not take the photo. But I was there. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA.

So yeah, I make a terrible criminal.


We rise by lifting others

Image result for kindness quotes

What used to be common sense – is now a trait that has to be actively ‘educated’ into the minds of citizens nowadays. What happened to basic manners and etiquette? Worse still – announcing yourself like a senior citizen/adult but carries him/herself like a child! Screaming, shouting, name shaming publicly .. not to mention those limited edition words of profanity and abuse.

And sometimes these group of people are those who hold powerful positions in the community/society. They set the rules and you, by hook and crook would have to obey that. Inevitably the 7 deadly sins always seems to find a way to penetrate relationships or organizations and cripple everything in a horrendous tumble.

So while it can be challenging or difficult to topple down Evil. I think we should take every measure possible to not be dragged into the devils politics and be a positive person.

I’m an avid fan of Kindness. No matter how small. Because it not only makes you feel good but it infects the people around you as well. Kindness can come in the form of a small nod of encouragement. A sincere smile. A helping hand. A motivating speech. A listening ear. A shoulder to cry on. The single best audience for a veteran bands comeback. A love song. A warm meal. A cold drink. A penny for the vending machine. A telephone number for a job prospect. A surprise parcel at times when you’re not expecting it. A ‘good luck’ card. A minute to exchange ‘hi’. A picture together.

We rise by lifting others

Happy New Year 2017


My new year started with a personal health scare – I’m still trying not to panic although I could sense Mr Husband having his own concerns. I’m just waiting for the signs and symptoms to kind of phase out and hopefully could attribute it to a normal aging process.If it doesn’t, I can imagine my whole year confined in a private hospital bed simply because I don’t want people to know. Urghh

My resolution this year does not fall far from the Tree of Empowerment.

  1. To keep educating myself be it in the knowledge surrounding my field of work, my hobbies and general stuff – this will involve a lot of reading and taking up courses. Perhaps a course in Photoshop or something like that.
  2. Journal to reflect more. #journalminci will be a regular feature I suppose
  3. Cyber connections – it’s been a while since the times of GUBU. Perhaps next year would be more among the PAMmers?
  4. Believe in Allahs plans more. More Tawakkal on top of Effort.
  5. Take holidays and time off whenever possible. Every moment counts – plus you want to create great memories all the time.


The test of evil whispers

“if you wish hard enough, your dream might just come true”

I have been struggling to complete a task lately. I have been asking for help but being ‘lumpy’ and ‘blur’ sometimes – it’s a bit of challenge trying to understand a new knowledge. So it’s a matter of re-reading stuff, discussing points with other people and loads of googling. I was on the verge of virtually dissipating into thin air plus the fact that I had another major thing going on does not help.

Anyway I was tested today. By God. yeh….. 

If I succumb to the evil whispers, I will end my shift way early – reach home earlier and cook up a storm in the kitchen for dinner.

If I remain honest, I’d probably reach home late and eat bread for dinner and well.. I still chose the latter.

Remarkably, a solution appeared in front of my very eyes. The answer to my question! In the form of another trusted colleague showing me how and what things need to be done. That was better than my hours of mindless, disorientated reading and I am forever grateful. Alhamdulilah. 

Did I still reach home late? Yes. It was I guess part of the deal. So no cooking for dinner  (I dah penat) and my son today learnt how to eat sushi for the first time. He loved it!

Nenek Suraya

I rarely talk about my job because it is so medico-legal related nowadays. I worry that I would accidentally spill on sensitive and confidential information regarding the case. Even if I take extra precaution to not mention the patients profile or disease – there is always a fear that someone who reads my blog would know that patient and proceeds to condemn me for say, embarrassing the patient and what not. Sedangkan Wardina and syed Azmi who did not mention the name of a Madrasah pun kena kecam.. apatah lagi kita kan.. 

But I just had to share about my anecdote with an elderly patient I came across last night during my oncall.

She was in her early 90s, a foreigner from our neighbouring country. She is of Malay descent who speaks very good English. She was at the emergency department for a fall and her small, weakened body sustained an injury at her right ankle. She was seen by my colleague and while awaiting for the porters to transport her to the Xray department – she kinda beckoned me over to her bed. Probably needing more painkillers, I thought.

In fact, I have treated her before for a simple fever. It was a visit many years ago when her also elderly husband was still around. I don’t think she would remember and just made it seemed like our first time meeting each other.

She quickly grabbed my hand as I neared her and asked of my name. She smiled and volunteered her own, “I am Suraya (not real name). I’m a Singaporean and I just hurt my foot”. All this in clear, crispy Queens English.

Her husband and one of her sons had recently passed away. She was a mother of 9 and specifically mentioned how blessed she was to have one daughter. A daughter she raised like carrying a cupful of oil. This lady encouraged her daughter to get a good education – a tertiary education. Indeed she succeeded as later the daughter landed a high paying job in the immigration department. The daughter got married , had a child and that’s when Nenek Suraya mentioned, “she broke my heart”.

“She wanted to quit her job. A job that puts the food on her table, a roof on her head.A job that makes her who she is. Why would she want to do that for her husband. You are supposed to think about your child – yang dia nak fikir pasal laki dia sangat kenapa. I can help cook for her. I can help care for her child. I just want her to keep her job and stand on her own two feet. And not having to ask of her husband for money each month for her own use! “

Honestly, I don’t see a problem in a woman wanting to do what she wants as long as she is clear about her plan and knows what she is doing. Long gone are the days where netizens debate on SAHM vs Working mom. In fact, it shouldn’t happen anymore in this era. Instead – we should move towards supporting fellow women with their decisions the best that we can and raise a community together.

But Nenek Suraya is heading to 100 years old. Perhaps there are pearls of wisdom I should pay attention to. I kept mum and kept my ears open.This was after all a woman who lived during the times when women were not as liberated and free to make their own choices as compared to what we are today. She experienced the whole world maturing and accepting women’s roles as equals when it comes to serving your nation. It seemed to her personal opinion that she failed to bring her daughter out from the traditional role as the one in the kitchen to the lady of certain power in the office. It was understandable . There was no need to be severely offended if say, you choose to achieve financial freedom by having a homebased business for instance or adopting homeschool to your kids full time. It was just her personal idea of how she chose to value her daughter. And I respect that.She’s not waging a war against women who makes informed decisions in quitting their 9 to 5 job for their family.

Because you see, I come from a similar background. Although my mother did not get to step foot in university – she was street smart and managed to command the household accordingly. It would be devastating to her if say, I chose to quit medicine despite completing my bond with the government to be at home. To her, it’ll be a waste of my ‘education’ because education was something she was deprived off in her younger years due to poverty and social circumstances. Although I yearn to be this mom at home , I still have second thoughts. out of respect for my moms wishes and her understanding of an empowered woman. Perhaps later, should I choose to pursue my freedom to dictate my own life – perhaps I could make her feel less sore by reassuring her that I’m replacing my income instead. At least she knows I’m not wasting my education but channeling it in a different manner.Kan? less mengejutkan… buat stationary based business ke apa kan.. 

At the end of the day, mothers just want their daughters to lead their lives better than how it was for them before. Who would want their precious daughter to go through hardship similar to theirs kan? After much sobbing and pouring her heart out, Nenek Suraya finally let go off my already numb hand. Again, she asked me of my name and returned the gesture with, ” “I am Suraya (not real name). I’m a Singaporean and I just hurt my foot”.