A happy woman is an attractive person. Which explains why the Angels of Victoria Secret look so majestic, magical and beyond reach. A flash of their huge smile could melt Elsa ‘s snow palace in seconds.
Taking a step closer to my homeland, we have women like Vivy Yusof, Marion Caunter and Sazzy Falak to name a few… that portrays an image of SuperMom in Malaysia. They are mothers to their kids and have a bustling career all year round. I am also grateful that they don’t coin terms like ‘fulltime mother’. Like, is there such thing as a part time mother??!!
They make Motherhood seem so glamorous and fun – as though their lives are full of sunshine all year around. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE THESE WOMEN. And I totally understand that amidst the sunshine, just like any other moms, these could be rainbows … those colourful bridge of colours one get after a downpour. Everyone has their personal battles right?
I follow them on Instagram. I read their blogs. I forced myself to look into why these women are so attractive in their own manner. Of why other moms want to become like them. And this is what I discovered:
1. They made their own mark. They were able to stand on their own two feet before they met their respective partners. These ladies are not trophy wives. Instead they could potentially turn their spouses into one if he doesn’t buck up. It is important for any woman to establish herself as someone full of wort. We not need be famous. We don’t have to own a multi-million ringgit company. But we should be able to define ourselves for who we are. Dato Siti Nurhaliza for example is referred to as herself, Malaysia’s songbird now cosmetic entrepreneur. We don’t call her Datuk K’s wife, right? Hence I, for instance should aim to be known as myself rather than Mr Husband’s wife.
2. They work hard. They play just as hard. And it shows through the smiles in pictures. The social events they attend. They are not afraid to SHOW how a particular job gets done. They share these secrets and genuinely want other women to follow suit. To actively chase their dreams. Which trails on to the next point.
3. They seem to be able to balance it all. Its as though they keep genies in their perfume bottles who could regenerate more time so they could work, have time to date the husband, play with the kids, workout to maintain that fabolous body etc. This beautiful illusion of proper time management is something all moms covet. Including myself. But if they can do it.. then why not. But here’s the secret. They know how to ask for help. Supermom has a team of little elves behind the scenes. In fact, this is how everything is able to fall into place. It’s not a crime. There’s no rule in saying supermoms must work alone. NO. Supermom knows how to delegate, organize and pick the best help around. This comes in the form of an understanding husband, a trustable nanny, dependable work colleagues and so on.
4. They still have their girl-friends. Those girls you’d hang out with before you met The One. This I feel is something that I have kind of neglected. The power of GirlPower. Its easy to toss aside those friends or housemates you’ve lived with for the past 5 years in medical school once we step into marriage. But this doesnt happen in these ladies lives. If you notice, they still hang out with the girls. They have the occasional gossip session, brunches or lunch. All this, without the husband or kids. Get what I mean? Your very own Spice Girl group is a great way to survive motherhood.
5. A strong supportive family to begin with. Their own parents and siblings that is. Notice that it takes nuturing from the early years of their lives to become who they are today. As the Malay proverb goes, ‘melentur buluh biarlah dari rebungnya’. Despite some of them not born with a silver spoon in their mouth or a privileged educational background, they were still able to defy all odds and create their own form of success in the world. This is something we should learn, I should learn. To not think that just because I don’t have a headstart, I can’t make something out of myself. If the tortoise could outrun the hare in the race, why shouldn’t we. Kan?
But these are just my plain observations. *peace*