I had always thought that Hazeeq loves being around Mr Husband because it goes without saying that he just loves Abah more (ye ke?) and that Mr Husband plays the sword games better with him. I soon realized that it didn’t matter what game I choose to play with Hazeeq – what he is really looking for is interaction. Fun interaction. Meaning … his questions answered. His demands fulfilled. Ha ha.
Mr Husband has been on a tight working schedule lately. Thus his sleeping clock has been fast forwarded to very early hours of the night. Dahlah mata ayam, kepak gik ya. So he’s usually dead asleep by half 8 and as for myself.. latest is 10pm on a non oncall day/PM shift.
Hazeeq on the other hand, does not sleep on the same hour. At most is by 9 pm if we’re not going anywhere. So being the bored lad he is, he starts seeking attention. That’s when I discovered that although what I’m doing seems boring – it opened up a new world to this little guy. If only you could see his curious little eyes peeking over your shoulder, trying to see what is making his mommy busy.
His frequent questions were along the lines of
what are you doing
why this, why that
what is that, what is this
and not that I’m doing a scientific experiment or anything. Sometimes its just random activities like folding the laundry, watching my korean drama, completing a work-related task et cetera.. But Hazeeq seems to enjoy that one to one interaction. He wants to know what I’m doing.
Mummy buat apa tuh..
He would choose the pillow I use for sleep. He’ll say, ‘bukan.. bantal ni kerathh’. He even chooses the colour of my towel. It has to be brown and not yellow, cause its his. He will babble about Doraemon and his terbang2. Sometimes he makes me pick up the sword and duel with him. At other times, he just wants a cuddle and play baby in my arms. ahhhh.. sweet boy. He just wants to have fun. Or in other words – attention. Which is why he would prefer someone who gives him that attention. Like the dad!!
This experience inadvertently taught me something about motherhood – that I’m a somewhat ‘quiet mother’. I mean, I talk to him and stuff but am not as open as how Mr Husband is towards my boy. Its as though my raw love is not fully unleashed – chained by uncertainties. My love is not 100% transparent and accessible. LOL. But well, it is not too late to improve on that.
100% undivided attention coming right up!