Hanez Suraya : Been there.. nearly done that.

A mistress should be like a little country retreat near the town, not to dwell in constantly, but only for a night and away.

William Wycherley

Lets face it. Hanez Suraya is a girl who is currently in a ‘bounce back’ position. And I myself have been in that position twice. And in both circumstances I was tricked or perhaps was naive enough to think that the problem was not with him,  but always the girl. While no Wife or Children were involved, there was still her woman. The girlfriend. Or fiance.

I was mistaken into perceiving that I was the best thing that happened in this guy’s life. That I was The One for them both. Sadly, no.

I was not good enough to be the best girl in their lives. I was merely a refreshing change to their monotonous relationship. While it was true that I was a different sort of girl, one that they had never considered dating, and by that I mean the ‘girl-next-door’ sort of thing.. them being them still goes back to the type they were looking for. The girls they were more familiar with and happier with.

I was just a bounce-back girl. And once they had their souls mended they would suddenly come to a realization that things between us were just not meant to work out.

Come to think of it, I am grateful for these experiences. Apart from recognising these species of men as douchebags, I too get to discover powerful traits of myself. But lets not discuss about me. Lets just trash these men.

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Despite my lack in so called stable relationships and countless mini-dates, I have learnt important things regarding men. I have learnt not to trust men who;

  1. Says they want to marry you instantly despite having only dated for a month.While Love at first Sight exists. it doesnt mean you have to start looking for a wedding planner STAT.
  2. Will change their habits in a jiffy as soon as you say you will marry them. or do something for them. For instance ” I will stop smoking once we get hitched’. honestly, he doesnt need you to be an excuse to change for the better. He should ‘bettered up’ prior to having your hand in marriage.
  3. Says hes in the middle of a divorce or in the midst of a separation phase prior to breaking up. This means he’s just testing the waters with you and will only break off relationship with A once he is secured with Relationship B. If he is damn serious, he should be fearless enough to be standing on his own two feet, clean out the closet and sock drawers to make room for your things in his home.
  4. Never talks about his own family. or talks too much about his ex-wife, ex-gf, ex-relationship. and pinning the faults too much on them. come on, there must be one thing that he did wrong. listen to his story but take it with a pinch of salt.
  5. At the end of the short lived romance decides to end it all by saying, ‘The problem is me… not you”. They think it will make you feel better about yourself. Unfortunately, that is not how things work.

I cant say for sure what is going on inside Hanez Suraya’s head at the moment. However if it was me, I would want to dig deeper as to why this man who is asking your hand in marriage despite his divorce has yet to be finalized is willing to divorce the mothers of his two children that quick. Surely there is more than what meets the eye.

It’ll be a pity if this beautiful face Hanez Suraya falls in the hands of a shark. It’ll be a pity if say, she is the pure soul  that she claims she is, to be used and disappointed by this Romie. Who in turn has disappointed his to-be-former wife. My prayers are with Hanez, hoping that she will reconsider her decisions and statements in the near future. This is an actress with a potential to contribute more to the film industry. Lets not tarnish that image for lust shall we?

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3R : Read, Reflect, Respond

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