“If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them”
The theme of today is : Emotionally Charged
I started my morning with an emotionally charged discussion with a patient and her husband regarding her medical condition. Honestly, seeing the doctor first thing in the morning to ask regarding ones wellbeing or progress is not a wise thing. Especially when the ward is run under a specialists supervision. the best time is probably during designated visiting hours where doctors are surely to be around to answer questions. Early morning encounter not only deprives the doc-in-charge to do his/her rounds to other patients (which is not fair) but also in the event of a heated argument, it will leave everybody in a foul mood for THE WHOLE DAY!
Later in the afternoon we had a Mortality & Morbidity review.
Its difficult to stay calm especially when you’ve got 5 cases to present with drawbacks in each, hopefully with an intention to improve. Though no names were mentioned, there were accusatory tones in terms of giving the presentation and also from those providing expert opinions on the matter. In short, it was an uncomfortable 300 minutes. I could feel all my vital organs burning, heated at most, throughout the meeting eventhough I did not participate directly in the discussions.
Then when I returned home, I was hit with another avalanche of negative emotions.
I had to, again, apologize to the person involved of my husbands abrupt and seemingly rude comment. Honestly, this is not the first time – apologizing on behalf. Although yes, he had a point to the person.. I believed it could be conveyed in a more gentleman manner. perhaps its because Im a peaceful person myself and perhaps it was because the person had a change in his tone and demeanour after the ‘teguran’ by Mr Husband. It just left this very uncomfortable feeling in my throat and an ugly aura in the room itself. Mr Husband wanted to appear heroic but unfortunately at a price.
*Sigh*. Im spent. Emotionally.